When you get beyond the spin, the campaign spending, the YouTube spots, and the paid advertisements, what do the Democratic contenders stand for, really? What did Hillary Clinton learn from Nixon? What does Barack Obama have in common with Justin Timberlake? Who are the two John Edwardses? Is America ready for the vegan presidency of Dennis Kucinich? What makes Al Gore rock and roll? Why do Joe Biden, Christopher Dodd, Bill Richardson, and Mike Gravel bother? Find out in this irreverent guide to the 2008 presidential candidates.